“I slept and dreamt that life was joy. I awoke and saw that life was service. I acted and behold, service was joy.” ~  Rabindranath Tagore.

When you grow up in the church, it goes without saying that you soon learn that doing unto others, caring for the least among us, is done without thinking.  I used to say it helped me (unfortunately) develop a severe case of co-dependency as it seemed only right to put the needs, wants, desires of others ahead of my own needs.  It is a trait (or a pathology!) which works very well in the field of healthcare, where nurses soon learn to ignore all bodily urges (like the need to eat, drink, or go to the bathroom) until after all of your patients are taken care of, every phone call answered, every family spoken to (and sometimes those call lights just keep popping on!). 

This admirable though unhealthy tendency can then bleed over into personal relationships, most naturally of course as a mother.  I had no difficulty (well, not exactly none) shelling out big money for the latest sneakers for my boys (although I put my foot down when it came to the Air Jordans in the 90s, paying over $100 was ridiculous!), while I was looking for something under $25 for my own shoes! Being selfless, putting others first, may seem like the Christian thing to do, but it often leads to resentment, until you realize that you are the one who has trained the people in your life to think that this is the way it should be.  It was an older co-worker who once reminded me that the children I was raising this way were to become spouses and parents, that I was setting a bad precedent.  ‘If you tell them you aren’t worth a Mother’s Day gift’ she told me ‘they will believe you!’

By the time I was in my early forties, I had settled into a pattern of work, sleep, and motherly duties.  A library visit was my big treat.  Around this time, I received a phone call from a schoolmate from my high school days in Jamaica.  She had been in touch with several of our other schoolmates, and a few of them wanted to get together for fun, just to ‘lime’ (that Trini word which means to hang out with friends or family, for conversation, food and drinks, according to AI!).  And so I showed up, along with twenty or thirty other people I may have gone to school with, or who went to the same high school at a later time, and yes, we limed!

That informal meeting gave impetus to something far more productive, and after a few months what started as a social gathering became an organization, a chapter of our high school alumni association, and along with a constitution, an executive board, and a lot of enthusiasm, an organization was formed.  That was 27 years ago.  It also was the rebirth of my social life, one which had been (until then) limited to child-related activities!  Over the past almost thirty years, we have sent over $300,000 worth of scholarships to students from our high school, to assist with school fees, books, and other costs that are difficult to find for many of the parents of high schoolers in Jamaica.

Our biggest fund-raising activity each year centers on Labor Day weekend.  This was an inspired date, as the three-day weekend makes it enticing for past students who live out of town to attend, with that extra day for them to travel home.  It is the end of summer, another enticement for those who live in cooler climes.  It does, however, sit bang in the middle of hurricane season, which can produce nail-biting perusal of NOAA’s website in the weeks leading up to the event! And South Florida’s typical rainy season pattern (well, thunderstorm pattern would be more accurate!) doesn’t help as the weekend includes a cook-out in the park as our ‘day after’ event.

What started out as an annual ‘dinner-dance’, ‘ball’, or ‘banquet’, has morphed into four days of non-stop partying, especially for the out-of-towners!  The love of our high school, a set of buildings perched among the hills of Clarendon, on a 120 acre campus with views of the surrounding mountains, keeps us coming back every year.  For those of us on the organizing committee, the weekend is looked forward to with excitement and a little dread, as we know the work and effort needed to carry it off.  But we are carried by the enthusiasm and support of the attendees, and know that we get to dance, laugh and have fun even as we raise funds for those in need.

Whenever I see the poet Tagore’s quote above, I think of the work of our organization.  Our fund-raising activities meet both the act of service, and the production of joy, of camaraderie, of fellowship.  Is it really that simple?  That we can take care of others, while not ignoring our own needs, and in doing so, generate genuine joy?

It is important to be reminded of the existence of generosity, philanthropy, selflessness in an era where cruelty, greed and corruption seem to be everywhere.  It is crucial that we remind each other that there are more of us out there who still hold on to the values and principles instilled in us by our parents, teachers and religious leaders.  When our devices keep us updated on all of the horrors of an administration which seems to have gone off the rails: putting profits over people; implementing policies that take from the poor to give even more to the rich; disregarding years of scientific evidence over the irrational opinions of the few; it is essential that we spread the word about the activism, the resistance, the ways that many are fighting back to support those who are being attacked.  For there are many signs of hope, there are many who are doing the work, there are law firms fighting tirelessly to push back on unconstitutional acts.  It is imperative to not give up, to join in where we can, to have faith that the structure of democracy will hold firm, when ‘We the People’ stand together.  As the poet Rabindranath Tagore also said: ‘Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark’.

This Friday morning, as I am still dancing to the sound of last weekend, I give thanks for the decision my father made many years ago, to transplant our family from the UK to Jamaica.  I send big thanks to those of my schoolmates who made the effort to get us connected again, twenty years after we left high school, which led to this tradition of giving back.  And to all of those who have celebrated with us over the years, allowing us to find such joy sprinkled with sweat and raindrops, we appreciate you taking the time and the money to join us every chance you get.  You keep us young!

Have a wonderful weekend, Family! And if you get a chance, find your people, your community, and hang out with them (lime!).  It will help you to remember that we are stronger together.

One Love!

Namaste.