“Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.” ~ Unknown.

My mother had a few odd sayings she would throw at me when, as a teenager, I would be obsessing about some perceived flaw (usually on my face).  ‘A blind man and (or on?)  a galloping horse…’ which was supposed to let me know that no one would see said flaw.  Another saying, prompted by my worry about some injury, some cut or even perhaps a mosquito bite, was: ‘It will be a pig’s foot in the morning!’ How that was supposed to reassure me I have no idea.  Growing up in Jamaica I learned far more practical advice, such as to wear my underwear inside out if I wanted to ‘run duppy’ (keep ghosts at bay).  My father-in-law, a firm believer in Obeah, ghosts, and all such things went a step further.  He carried a square of ‘blue’ (used to get white clothes whiter) on him at all times.  But that, as my father would have said, ‘is neither here nor there.’

One of the joys of going back to school at the age of fifty, having been a nurse at that time for almost 30 years, was to learn how much I didn’t know about nursing.  It was with great surprise that I learned that nurses led all the professions as far as ‘honesty and ethics’ go (three in four people voted for nurses).  In the Gallup poll conducted every year, nurses have led all other professions since 1999.  The only year that another profession rated higher, followed 9/11, when firefighters led the way.  Trust in Judges has declined to 28%, while members of Congress are only slightly ahead of car salesman (7%).

This recognition of nurses gave me first a burst of pride, followed by a question, but what about respect?  It was wonderful to reflect that the public trusts nurses, since nurses are often first at the bedside when you are at your worst, perhaps unconscious after a car crash, and you trust that they will not rob you blind.  But more than that, the nurse is entrusted with your confidential medical history, trusted not to make your most private moments go viral on social media.  Of course that is also protected by law.  But there is another factor.  The nurse cannot profit from your illness, as she/he is paid by the hospital, not by your insurance company.  Other healthcare providers may make more money based on how complex your case is, or how much treatment you require, but the nurse has no financial benefit from you remaining ill. 

For a while, during and after the pandemic, nurses, along with other health care workers, were lauded as ‘heroes’, given professional discounts, praised publicly for their dedication and self-sacrifice.  They endured the most horrendous conditions, as supplies of personal protective equipment dwindled, and they were forced to break every infection control rule and risk their own health.  They (behind masks and goggles) had to replace loved ones at the bedside of those dying of Covid, being the last voice the patient would hear, unless they were able to connect families through video calls.  And then rush off to the next patient.

Nursing has always been that connection, that link between patient and physician; between life and death; between hope and reality.  But once a crisis is over, the nurse goes back to being the person who didn’t bring the medications on time, or the person left explaining after the physician left the room.  Or (worst of all) just a nurse.  Often disrespected, always overworked, an expense item on the Financial Officer’s spreadsheet.  And, from reading social media posts of current, young, bedside nurses, things are not improving. 

On the subject of Gallup polls, another one caught my attention recently.  The World Happiness Report, produced by Gallup and other partners, reported that Jamaica leads the world in being most likely to show kindness to strangers.  This is one of the criteria apparently, which leads to happiness or wellbeing.  Other aspects that contribute to happiness are caring and sharing; living and connecting with others; supporting others; trusting and giving to others.  Interestingly, although Jamaicans led all countries in their kindness to strangers, they did not lead in charitable giving.  Which is intriguing, since it shows that even though they may not have the means to donate financially, they are still willing to offer aid to a stranger.

Which in these times of scams and trickery, is a lovely thing to know! But it is also evidence of the paradox that is Jamaica.  In a recent trip there I observed that it is still a place where people automatically greet strangers that they pass on the road.  On a Saturday morning walk up a steeply inclining hill, it is very easy to engage in conversation (if breath permits) with others who are also getting their daily exercise, even if you have never met them before.  If you stop a while (to catch your breath), someone is likely to stop too, to make sure ‘you awright?’. 

There was a story told some years ago, of a Japanese family who came to Jamaica for some musical event.  They were featured in a beautiful coffee table book of ‘Locks’, featuring the many faces of those who wear the Rastafarian inspired (originating in the Bible) creed of not combing or cutting the hair, resulting in ‘Dreadlocks’.  For those not of African descent, it may require more than just not combing the hair.  But this Japanese couple had persisted in getting their straight hair to ‘lock’.  When they arrived in Jamaica, the only English they supposedly spoke were the lyrics to Bob Marley’s songs! And yet, somehow, they connected with the Rastafarians in Jamaica and were hosted by a local family, and made to feel very welcome. 

Kindness to strangers seems like a worthy practice to emulate, and a very hopeful theme to end on.  In a world where we are seeing the U.S. bomb boats and their occupants out of the water, without evidence of wrongdoing; where masked men are dragging young women out of cars and kneeling on their necks for the crime of appearing to be undocumented (also known as not being white); where millions of dollars are being withheld from the most vulnerable of Americans, (also known as ‘the least of these my brethren’) while more is being sent to Argentina; we long to see more random acts of kindness.  A popular meme says: ‘In a world where you can be anything, choose to be kind’. 

On this Friday morning, I hope that you can show some respect to those professions that we take for granted.  You never know when you will need them! Let us not forget some of the tenets that we repeat so freely, to love even those that ‘trespass against us’ (somewhat challenging, I know!). And while practicing kindness to others, remember to be kind to yourself.  These are some trying times!

Have a wonderful weekend, Family!

One Love!

Namaste.